Friday, February 17, 2012

"Honey, Can you get the door? The Nuns are back!"

This story is either really depressing or really funny depending on how you choose to take it. I'm choosing funny because Prozac is expensive stuff :)

We made a heartbreaking decision on Monday to disrupt the placement of Baby 6. We agreed to wait until court on Wednesday when the county was "sure" he'd be discharged to his Relative Resource.

I met Baby 6's Mom on Wednesday morning. She was so nice and we hit it off right away. I didn't say anything to her about disruption because it was going to be a non issue, 6 would be returned after court that afternoon. He was all packed and ready to go when I got a text from his Mom saying he'd be with us for another 2 weeks because the judge denied the placement with RR even though the county, parents, and law guardian were in support of it.

The caseworker said that she is "sure" 6 will be discharged to RR when they go back to court in 2 weeks. Technically, that won't interfere with our adoption because we leave tentatively on March 1st to meet our daughter. But I have little to no faith in the county's prediction of how this case will end. So I asked for him to be moved still. And I heard nothing....

....until Thursday at 4:30 when the matcher called and said that there was a nun- like habit and rosary nun- who wanted to talk to me about taking him. I called Sister Foster Parent twice on Thursday with no success.

This morning I got a call from the caseworker that Sister Foster Parent would be picking 6 up today at noon. I was kind of torn about this placement. As much as our home is not right for Baby 6, I don't know that putting him in a convent is right either. It was a "beggars can't be choosers" moment though and I scheduled the meeting at my house. Sister Foster Parent brought a junior nun with her to meet 6 they seemed normal enough and I thought he warmed up to them well. Baby 4 and I waved to him as they left and I felt a HUGE wave of relief.

....until THEY BROUGHT HIM BACK!!!! What?! Is that even a thing? They can just bring him back? It was literally on 2.5hrs before he was back at my house body slamming my couch. Turns out the nunnery has concrete floors and the first time he got on all fours and started banging his head, they decided this wasn't going to work and put in a call to the county who set it up with me to take him back while they looked for another option.

Seriously. This is the cutest kid anybody could hope for. He's a bruiser for sure and he's got the terrible two thing down to a science, but all he needs is someone who will throw themselves fully into helping him. Someone who will claim him as their own and stick it out the first rough weeks or month. There is no one in my whole county willing to do that for a baby? Everyone wants babies!!

At 4:30 this afternoon, the caseworker calls me with the name and number of a foster home who is considering taking Baby 6. They already have 5 children from 15yrs- 11mo, and Mom home schools all of them. I called her and talked with her a little bit about him and offered to bring him to her. She didn't want to move him right away, and thought visits first would be good. OK, that's a good idea. Then she told me her boys play basketball tomorrow, so a visit then probably isn't a good idea... Well maybe Sunday after church... She's nervous about him being aggressive with their 11mo old...

So basically he's not going anywhere. It's going to get to the point where I have to demand that he be moved immediately, which is unfortunate because I've really been trying to play nice. The agency is closed on Monday, so definitely no moves until Tuesday. I just keep thinking if he fit perfect in our family and we desperately wanted him to stay, he would have been sent home already. Foster Care is tricky that way.

On the other hand, this experience has made me feel a little better about our decision to disrupt. If holy servants of the Lord want to return him, obviously I'm not the problem :)


  1. Your last sentence made me laugh out loud!

    I do hope the powers that be are able to find a suitable home for this little guy. It's so sad to know what he needs and for it to not be available.

    I hope that God above gives you what YOU need to get through this until the powers that be are able to actually do something. Praying for you!!!

  2. I agree with Cherub Mamma! That was so funny. Wow. I didn't know that there were nuns that were foster parents. Interesting. I hope that the best place can be found for this little guy and that you aren't forced to demand someone take care of it. Congrats on your little girl :)