Sunday, February 2, 2014

Super Bowl

Baby 4's life changed forever on a Super Bowl Sunday. He woke up a healthy boy and ended his night in the trauma room of the local children's hospital emergency department. He doesn't know anything about the Super Bowl or it's connection to him- but I do. The Super Bowl isn't the same for me now.

It would be another 8 weeks before I knew anything about him. I didn't know my son was fighting hard for his life through surgeries and painful daily procedures. I wish I did know. I wish I could have been there.At the same time, I'm really glad I wasn't. I'm not as strong as Baby 4. I'm not as resilient. I'm not that kind of survivor or over-comer. He is special. He has a rare gift.

Baby 4 wishes I had been there too. This story may just be the moment that I fell in love with Baby 4. He has since led me to many moments where I weep at the tragedy and laugh at the absurdity all at the same time.

I was putting Baby 4 to bed about two years ago when he brought up his Mom- who he hadn't see in nearly a year, and who I have never met. He asked:

Why didn't you stop Susan* from hurting* me?

Oh, Baby. I really wish I could have stopped her. I didn't even know you then.

What would you have said?

I would have said, "Stop! Baby 4 is very special, and we treat special people nicely. We don't hurt them!"

What would she have said?

I think she would have said, "You're right. I shouldn't hurt Baby 4, even though I'm frustrated, because I love him."

Nuh- Uh!!! She would have said, "I'M A CUT YOU!"

Mmmm.. You know, I think you're probably right. She would have said that.

* You know, I change details for privacy.